My friend, Ian Hope has been both a Mentor and a Mentee. Beyond that, Ian has also organized and implemented a mentorship program for the Maintenance Enforcement Program of Alberta Justice in the early 2000s. He recently provided with this true story on his own experience and talks about the powerful impact that teachers can have as a Mentor.
Ian has provided the following extract from his forthcoming compilation with
Mari-Lyn Harris. “Kindness Ripples” is scheduled to launch on November 13, 2012 - World Kindness Day.
Here is Ian's story: "The Teacher Mentor"
When we
think of the word ‘mentor’, school teachers are not the first occupation that
may come to mind. But in truth,
good teachers also mentor and when they are in that role, they can make a huge
contribution to the lives of their students. Let me share with you my story about a remarkable teacher
who did just that for me!
It was a sunny
afternoon in early May, 1968 when I was finishing off my grade 12 at Archbishop
MacDonald High School in Edmonton, Alberta. I’m afraid to say that at that time I wasn’t a very
motivated student even though I had passed with honors from grades 1-9. What was the difference in those high
school years? Ok, I admit that
discovering girls certainly was a factor - but an even more important reason was
the fact I had started working at the age of 14 in the hotel business … with
shifts past midnight and then compensating by dozing off through daytime
classes. The money was pretty good
with tips and all, and I had come to believe that I could live quite well,
‘thank you very much’ with a full time job as a bellhop … really, who needs a
college education I had decided!
I was at
least getting by in most of my subjects but I could tell Mathematics 30 was definitely going to
be my ‘Waterloo’. On the Easter
exams I had the distinction of getting the lowest mark in the school and I was
quite certain of the outcome in the province-wide final exams coming up in
June. The sooner I surrendered my
math text to Mr. Wayne Russell, my math teacher, the better! I was in fact quite anxious to drop the
book in his lap and get on with my life and future working in the hotel
industry!
At the end
of class, I waited for all the students to leave, apprehensive about what Mr. Russell’s
reaction was going to be. I fully
expected that I would get exactly the reaction that I so richly deserved … after
all I had been a pain in his side since September, sleeping at the back of the
class, seldom being able to answer any question when asked - and to save face
playing the ‘wise-guy’ and responding with smart-assed remarks (looking back I
admit to feeling dreadful).
I had played
the expected scene out in my mind a hundred times - Mr. Russell, would at first go
quiet, then look down and broadly grin, clearly enjoying the moment that he
finally ‘ground me into submission’. Next he’d take that awful book and slam it
on top of his desk, boisterously telling me what a waste of skin I truly was
and how he was happy to see me bail out of his class - that I didn’t appreciate
the education they were trying to give me, that I was lazy and would never
amount to anything anyway … and finally, that both he and the class would be the
better for my departure.
At that
moment I would go speechless, (gulp) tears welling up in my eyes, and I’d
finally slither out the door never to be seen by him again. I’d then be off to my next shift at the
hotel… although shaken and
humiliated, freed at last of any
more ‘math’ and shed of the thought of ever graduating and going on to
college … and most likely thinking to myself, ‘there, it’s done, it’s over’! Indeed, at the time and to this day, I
felt this is what I had deserved for the nuisance that I posed in Mr. Russell’s
class.
Instead, I
was astonished!! None of this
happened except the part about Mr. Russell initially going quiet. He asked me to close the door … then gestured
for me to sit down not far from his desk. He shared with me a story about
himself, as a young man having difficulty in high school - but in his case the
problem was with Physics 30. He
said that he too had wanted to quit late in the school year just as I had … but
something made him continue … he used the term ‘pulled up his socks’. He told me that he worked his tail off
for the last six weeks of the school year and actually managed to pass Physics
which was the only course that could have stopped him from going on to
university to eventually become a teacher.
I was
stunned by his response - how could he believe in me when I didn’t even believe
in myself? I was overwhelmed. His positivity under the circumstances
really humbled me and made me think - hey, he could be right! I started to think … maybe I can do
this, perhaps I should make the
effort, if not for my sake, to fulfill his expectation of me.
So after
sitting a while and thinking over what he’d said, I slowly picked up the book
and told Mr. Russell I’d try.
Clearly I had been deeply affected by Mr. Russell’s words that afternoon. Finally I began to apply myself and did
write the Math 30 exam at the end of June.
Well, it was
in about late July when the mail came with my final marks from Grade 12 …
although I wasn’t too worried about any of the other courses, I was certain
that the news would be bad for Math 30, but then my gaze scrolled down the
transcript to the line for Math 30. ‘Final Mark … 56%’ it read! I almost keeled over - I had passed!
Certain that
I’d fail math I hadn’t even bothered to put in an application to attend
University. Checking with the
Registrar’s office on the phone, I was delighted to find that all that was
needed at the time to be admitted to the Bachelor of Commerce program was 50%
in Math, and further that there actually was space for another first year
student - I was off in a flash with my application!
I went on to
graduate in 1972, ironically receiving honors in all of my mathematics programs
over the next four years - I had made the transition and was finally growing up.
With the education I was able to receive, I landed great jobs over the years
with the federal and provincial governments, and also in the oil industry. I was able to support a wife that
stayed home to raise our three kids and I had a long and successful career as a
professional accountant, ending as a leadership trainer.
I often
think how things might have turned out quite differently. What if Mr. Russell
didn’t have, for example, the wisdom to know that what I really needed in my
life at that critical moment was not an authority figure or a teacher, but a mentor? And what if he didn’t
have the patience to speak with me so positively, knowing not only what to say
but as importantly ‘how’ to say it?
And what if he hadn’t the great compassion to perform that act of
kindness in the classroom?
The years passed, but I did contact Wayne Russell to thank him and let him know how his mentoring had so dramatically improved my life - he deserved to know! I am determined that through kind acts and the skills that I have worked on over the years to become a worthy mentor, that I too will make a difference to others, lifting them when they are down and giving them hope.
MORE OF IAN: If you enjoyed Ian's story (and we trust that you did), here is a link to his website for more information on what he is doing now … http://www.kindness-ripples.com
ALSO:
Ian Hope kindly provided some insights to his perspective on Mentoring in one of our featured video interviews on YouTube. Click Here for a direct link to that informative 10 minute interview.
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